Annette Houston
“Saving the Next Generation by Breaking Cycles of Trauma”
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Written by Micah Chrisman
For some people, struggling with their mental health can lurk beneath the surface, rarely revealing itself until a crisis pushes them over the edge. That edge for Annette Houston came when one of her “friends”—who was a member of a gang—shot someone. Annette was 26 years old and homeless at the time, and her guy-friend told her that if she wanted to keep staying at his place, she needed to dispose of the gun for him. Rather than keep living in her current situation and get involved with his crime, Annette went to the bathroom, grabbed a bottle of pills, and headed out the door.
“I told myself I’d rather be dead than go through this,” she said. “As I was walking down the street, I started taking the pills one-by-one until I blacked out inside of a Walgreens. I woke up in the hospital and they were saying, ‘If we don’t get these pills out now, her kidneys are going to shut down.’ So, they pumped my stomach and saved my life.”
Annette grew up in Chicago, Illinois where she suffered physical and sexual abuse from her father as a child. To make matters more complicated, she became pregnant at the age of 15, so she ran away from home. She was recovered by the Department of Family Services and consequently had to address the court systems with regards to her situation.
“The judge said, ‘We can’t allow Annette back into the house so long as the abusive father is still living there’,” Annette recalled. “I watched my mother choose my father over me. So, I became a ward of the State of Illinois. They put me up in a young mothers group home where I continued to suffer from depression and attempted suicide multiple times, because at the age of 16, I figured if my own mother didn’t want me then I must be worthless and life isn’t worth living.”
Annette was in and out of mental health hospitals through her young adult years and she had two more children during that time. She swore she would never abuse her kids like her parents did, so her faith in God and her love for her children kept her moving forward. Despite her efforts to find stable work and housing conditions, her oldest child was taken from her by DFS. This heart-wrenching event is what pushed her to find any means necessary to protect and provide for her children. For fear of going to the homeless shelters and having her remaining two kids taken away, Annette sent them to live with their father and his wife so she could focus on her mental health and living situation. But after a time, she found out the stepmother was abusing her kids.
“Anytime I got my kids back from wherever they were staying, I would always give them baths to check their overall physical well-being, and that’s when I saw the bruises,” said Annette. “I realized the cycle was repeating itself, but this time with my own kids. So, I went to the courts and told the judge that I needed my kids back. But they refused, saying that since I was homeless, my children had to stay with their father.”
Some weeks later, Annette was able to get into a housing program where they placed her in an apartment, and soon thereafter she got a job at H&R Block and found additional work as a CNA. A year later, she went to court again and the judge granted her joint custody, and she and her children have been reunited ever since.
Some of Ms. Houston’s Caring Hands’ moms enjoying a parenting group with their children
One of the young moms receiving items for her new baby
Giving out school supplies and snacks during the Covid-19 pandemic
This journey of resilience led Annette to start her own nonprofit, Ms. Houston’s Caring Hands, where she works with women who are going through similar life situations like she experienced. It started with grassroots efforts where Annette bought and distributed diapers and baby supplies to women in her neighborhood. Today, the work has grown to offering more services year-round, such as their mentorship program where a mentor comes into the home, gives parenting advice and counseling, and teaches life skills such as budgeting, hygiene, how to deal with stress, self-care, self-love, and developing affirmations. Ms. Houston’s Caring Hands also hosts young mom groups, provides school supplies and personal care items, and even offers childcare so mothers can go shopping, go to medical appointments, or just have some personal time for their own well-being. Through the power of community support, Annette has mobilized volunteers and resources to uplift other mothers like herself and stop cycles of trauma before they can occur and affect the next generation.
“I do this work because it is very personal to me. I was that young mom who needed someone to understand what I was going through and not judge my circumstances,” said Annette. “Now I get to be that person of support for others. Ms. Houston’s Caring Hands is about seeing and valuing mothers for who they are and stopping cycles of child abuse. Today I get to help them pursue better lives for themselves and their children, as well as heal from past traumas. If we can just take the time to truly be with people and offer a little support, it can make a world of difference.”
To learn more about Ms. Houston’s Caring Hands, please visit mhchm.org.